Now as to the story: Concept Good but you need a proof reader and learn to use paragraphs and punctuation correctly.anonymous readerReport 2013-04-22 13:19:45YOU ARE A FUCKING ASSHOLE, and I hope you get captured and raped repeatedly since you seem to find it so entertaining. your opening sentence was enough to ruin my mood and piss me off. XNXX Video There you can talk to amateur women who look like your neighbor. Next time properly tag your stories so us readers who are not entertained by the rape, torture and slavery of innocents can avoid reading your sick shit. – you need a little bit more length to the story : this one has not even finished the initial encounter«1» Try and work on spacing text out, and paragraphs. Have fun :)anonymous readerReport 2013-05-12 01:37:21The wall of un paragraphed text certainly set a bad vibe, but the story certainly interests me so far.
